I got this email from Starhawk while on vacation and want to share it all with you. It's not so much about Christmas, but about the true meaning of Christmas and what real Christians should be standing for. WWJD? Not veto children's health insurance twice! Read on friends:

Starhawk & others were asked to respond to this question: "Earlier this month, the U.S. House of Representatives approved HR 847 recognizing the importance of Christianity and Christmas. Would you have voted for this resolution? How would you amend it?" And this is what she said:

Would I vote for a resolution affirming the importance and contributions of Christmas and Christianity? As my readers may have noted, I’m a Pagan, but I’d vote for such a resolution—heck, I’d even introduce it, if it went like this:

“Whereas Christians and Christianity are of undeniable importance in the world and the foundation of this country, in respect for his example and story at this time of year we make the following statements:

“Whereas Jesus Christ was born in a stable because his parents could not find shelter, and whereas in the last weeks we as a nation have allowed the destruction of the last remaining housing for the poor in New Orleans, and whereas our streets are full of the cold and the homeless, we repent of our policies and in his memory commit to housing all who wander without a roof or a welcome in our cities and our towns.

“Whereas Christ was born among the poor, lived and preached to the poor, we repent of the selfishness and shortsightedness that has failed to provide for all of our children, and commit ourselves to provide health care for all children and for all of the poor.

Read the rest at WaPo.

Too bad the media won't be brave enough to ask Huckabee or any of the other so-called religious guys on the GOP side of take a stand on this resolution. The bumper sticker says there will be no peace without Jesus...I say there will be no piece without love...for ourselves and for each other. That's what I think a long-haired dude in sandals would want.

Peace.

Labels: feminism, goddess

Parenting Beyond Belief has its own blog and I was reading thru is last night. I ran across a post about death. Death seems to be on the BIG questions that comes up when you talk about raising kids without religion. How do you explain it? But this post focused more on the phenomena that once someone is dead, they are immediately canonized. The hubby likes to joke that just once, just once that he'd like to see a report on TV about some guy who died in a tragic manner that a neighbor complains, "He was the biggest @$$. Never helped anyone without it benefiting himself."

My first experience of the weird immunity we grant to the recently dead was at my dad’s funeral. I was thirteen and he was forty-five, my age next year. I loved my dad. He was a good guy.

Still, the eulogies offered by Dad’s friends and colleagues struck me as…weird.

I remember one colleague of his saying, “Dave didn’t have an enemy in the world.” “He was always thinking of others, never a thought for himself,” said another. “Everyone loved him.” “He loved his family more than any man I’ve ever known.”

Okay. I guess.

Like I said, he was a good guy. But this was my first experience of the genuine canonization of the dead that is socially mandated. Although my dad was funny and smart and hardworking and endlessly curious, he also lost his temper frequently and even sprained his thumb once. Oh, while beating me, I left that part out. I had been a shit to my younger brother, again, and Dad had come off a 60-hour week, and he couldn’t find it in himself to not sprain his thumb on me.

I'm often struck with this subject when I'm at wits end about my mom. I hate to say that sometimes the way I get myself out of my rut is to remember the crappy things like when she told me that I'd just flunk out of college, so why get my hopes up about applying. She did later apologize during another fight that she just said it because she didn't want me to go. That's my mother's love for ya.

Reading Amy's post about her dad's funeral cemented the idea that we need religion or whatever we call it to make it thru the bad days. I've met only a handful of people who seem to thank their deity for the good days. But I think we all fall to our knees when we need help. And honestly, that's not such a bad thing. And just like religion, we need to remember the good things about people when they die. Hopefully those at the things that help us thru our loss. And maybe even make us laugh when our hearts are torn to shreds.

So while the practice of bending over backwards for the recently dead is strange and sometimes unfaithful to who that person is, I excuse at least those closest to the dead for it. It's all apart of the healing process.

That said, when I go (at a very old age and in my sleep) please put on one hell of a dance party. And if my death does make the news, say something about my bad grammar if you want to say something bad about me. *wink*

Labels: Books, goddess, writing

Last week, MotherTalk hosted a blog tour for a book about parenting and religion. The book, Parenting Beyond Belief: On Raising Caring, Ethical Kids Without Religion, takes the side of those parents who want to raise their children in a secular vein, without religion. We think the publication of this book gives us a chance to blog about religion and our families and the ways we parent, from a variety of angles.

This Friday, May 25th, we thought we'd invite everyone to blog about religion: what we do; what we don't; what our kids like, or don't; what we argue about; what we feel great about, or guilty of... the list goes on and on and the sky's the limit, bonanzas are all about conversation.

I'm in a mixed marriage. I'm a tree-loving, goddess-worshiping pagan. The hubby is a true Catholic. He likes to label himself that because as far as he's concerned he pretty much lives by what the Bible says, what Jesus would REALLY do, and not so much what TPTB rant about. I'm also a recovering Catholic, so you might really categorize me as a pagan Catholic. I identify a lot with the ethnic part of Catholicism; the way native Mexicans merged their pagan religion with Catholicism.

What we do is celebrate Christmas & Solstice and Easter & Ostara, althou I have to admit to being a lazy pagan and not really getting my butt in gear to do a ritual on any holiday. I personally celebrate Halloween and Samhain. I do believe that this year I will bring Ella into my celebration and get in gear with a real ritual for Samhain. (Yes, long-time readers more angst about my late mother!) I wear a goddess around my neck, the hubby wears a cross. The hubby prays each morning and evening and crosses Ella before we leave her somewhere. He's even teaching her how to cross herself. I rub my goddess when I need a little more strength or peace.

Tonight Ella went on and on about how if I die, she'd have to get a new mommy. Oy...Just what I need. I did talk about heaven. I do believe in a heaven/summerland, where we all go, except the most evil, when we die. (If the Catholics are right, save me a place in Hell, k?) But I phrased it as, "Most people believe..." Hopefully as she grows and keeps hearing that phrase, she'll understand that we want her to find her own path.

We don't go to church. The last time either of us went to a church without a wedding or funeral happening was me. Shocked, eh? Being a pagan can be lonely. So I tried out a UU church nearby. It was nice, but I dunno...Maybe later. And honestly I'm too busy to find a coven to really get involved with. Yeah, I know...Don't ask. I'm just confusing like that.

The only thing I feel guilty about is that Ella doesn't have official godparents. Having those seemed to be comforting to me as a kid. Maybe when she's a tad older and can understand what it means, we'll figure out some type of ceremony we can do in the backyard or at a UU church. The two couples who would be her godparents already know who they are. We told them as much around Ella's birth. (Reminder...get that damn will done!)

I hope that this this and that way of infusing religion into Ella's life keeps going as well as it has been. She's just shy of 4, so we have a long way to go. I do wonder what it'll be like when her friends start asking about it. Then again her best friends are one Jewish boy and one half-Jewish, half-some type of Christian girl (the dad doesn't talk about it). So being half-pagan and half-Catholic won't be too weird. Being my daughter will be tough enough!

All that said, I do fear how I'll be able to teach Ella to respect religion when fundamentalism runs rampant in this world. From fundie Christians in this country telling us who we can love and when I can reproduce to fundie Muslims in Iraq stoning girls to death just for falling in love with someone outside her faith. I guess we'll just borrow from the Catholics and hate the follower, love the faith. Or something like that.

Which brings me to our only big argument about religion - Catholic school. Living in Chicago, it's tough to find a good public school and with all this BS-"School Choice" it's almost impossible. Which forces us to look at private, independent, and *gulp* religious schools. Catholic schools are out. Period. No discussion. OK, maybe a little. But the hubby has to do the research and present the case. I can't give money to an institution that continues to lie and cover up about child rape and then call me out for being pro-choice. And that's just the beginning.

I think the best thing for her is to be exposed to as many different faiths as possible so she can choose or build her own path.

Labels: blogging, Books, Ella, family, feminism, goddess, writing

Taking 2 days off of work has never hurt so much. And I'm taking 2 more next week, well I'm traveling for work, but still 2 days out of the office. Oy...this is gonna really hurt!

I think I caught up with my emails. If I missed yours, just poke me. I'm squishy, it won't hurt.

Some questions were posed in my comments, so here it goes:

1) Goddesses can wear capes. They are goddesses, they get to wear what they want. Which explains my fashion choices. And yes, purple is the color of choice for this goddess.

2) Abstracts...ok, they seem like a lot, but they aren't really. The hardest part of writing a good abstract is knowing your conclusion and being willing to give away the ending. This is not a formal way of writing one (you can find that here) but this is how I do it. In all honesty, it should be the last thing you write. But since many calls for books, articles, etc. ask for an abstract, you have to think about it as a Cliff Notes version of your future book chapter/article. It should be about 200-300 words long, cover your idea for the article, include the reasons why YOU should be the author, and give a little background of the idea. Sound hard? It is. At least for me who likes to ramble on and on...What you should remember is that this is all that the reviewer will read about your idea, what would make them contact you about writing a full article?

3) My writing. I'm moaned about wanting to do more writing since I left college in 1997. People have given me advise here and there. I read A LOT, but I haven't been writing as much. So I'm trying to write a lot more than I usually do.

whew! I think that's it. For now. I have a blog post about Jessica's moaning about the second wavers in my head. Hopefully tonight after I get our taxes done (I swear I will!) I can get it out the door. I'm starting to find it highly amusing that I like to take such "high profile" articles and thorw in my 2 cents for my 4 readers. But it's all about the process, right? And not the fame, right? Aw, I'm just tired and a little pissy. Time for more of Carol's chocolate chip cookie from Whole Foods. YUM!

Labels: blogging, goddess, writing

As we begin a new year many people take this time to rediscover their spiritual paths. "The Book of Goddesses" is an excellent addition to your bookshelf whether or not you are committee to the Goddess path. Not at all. Kris Waldherr not only wrote this book but also beautifully illustrates this collection. It looks and feels like a coffee table book, but it's not meant to just be looked at.

The collection is broken into six categories: beginnings, love, motherhood, creativity, strength, and transformations. When I was a kid and imagined God coming to help, I knew my emergencies were very minor compared to others. Thus I began at a very young age imagining God as separate specialized entities for each of my requests. You can see why once I began to learn about the Greek Gods & Goddesses that it all made sense to me. Heck, lil Roni once made a 'zine about Aphrodite in grade school.

My favorite section is motherhood, for obvious reasons. Waldherr (re)introduces us to Yemanja, the Santeria goddess of the ocean, who transforms into/is renamed to the Virgin Mary after Catholicism is introduced to the Yoruba in Cuba. We also meet Juno (Roman), Haumea (Polynesian), Renenet (Eqyptian), The Wawalak (Australian aboriginal), Demeter (Greek), and Maia (Greek).

The illustrations are simply breathtaking. You can see some of her illustrations in her portfolio.

So if you are in the market for a new Goddess book to not only learn from but gawk at, this is it. Valentine's Day is next month...and there is a love section!

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Disclaimer: I received this book after I was pitched thru Dawn's Get Them Blogging site. If you want to be pitched, join up! Thanks Dawn & thanks Kris for sending me this book!

Labels: Books, goddess

An early morning present for you all.

One question that was posed to Starhawk was, "What is the role of feminist spirituality in today's world? And what do we do with people who don't claim the feminist label?"

She used a phrase that I think I've heard before, but not in this context and I think it was brilliant.

Intuitive Feminist

These are women whose brains function like a feminist, they expect to live in a feminist world, but won't claim the label.

She cautions us to go easy on them because they were raised in a time of entitlement. My generation & those that follow expect certain things. We all know the argument.

I googled the phrase and came up with a zillion different ways intuitive feminist has been used. Other than its use in a conversation with SanFran indie film artists, I think that Starhawk's use really is dead on. I think it helps me understand women who don't claim the label of feminist. If I missed a whole body of feminist theory, please leave me links!

Labels: feminism, goddess

For those of you who don't know who Starhawk is, she is amazing. She wrote 2 of the books that I base my goddess worship on. I first read her freshmen year of college and just knew that what she was saying was right. She knew how to put all those thoughts that ran in my head into order.

Last night I went up to Northwestern to see her speak at the conference, "The Feminine Divine in Cross-Cultural Perspective." I know what you're thinking, "Roni, why didn't you go to all of it?" Well my dears I just couldn't find time for all three days. I guess that's why I'm a lazy pagan. But I made it up to see her speak.

Her talk was titled, "Goddesses for the End Times" and immediately discussed why she titled her talk as such. For one she does not think we are at the "End of Times" as some people think we might be at. The phrase comes from when she was down in NOLA helping with the clean-up with Common Ground. She found a Barbie doll covered in muck and went to clean it and toss it. Then she thought better of it. She cleaned her up a bit and placed in a green bush with one arm extended as if to wave 'hi'. Starhawk thought someone should return to their home with someone welcoming them. As she walked away, she thought that the Barbie looked like a goddess, in her green bush. That Barbie became the Goddess of End Times.

Starhawk is also a huge environmentalist. She spent a lot of time discussing how global climate change cannot be reversed until we give up a powerful story/belief - That humans transcend nature's limits.

She went on to discuss a list of goddesses that she believes we need during the end times or just times of chaos, which is now.

* Goddess of true humility: She brings us back to being human, to being dirty/mucky.
* Goddess of loss & grief: Her face could be an Iraqi mother, Cindy Sheehan, or an old growth tree in the middle of a clear cut. Despair empowerment. Starhawk talked a lot about how we get stuck in our grief. (more on that later) She also pointed out that we can't have fertility without death - ask a gardener.
* Goddess of transformative action: Her face could be tree sitters, Zapatista women. Starhawk discussed one meaning of power - the ability to create from within and how that does not limit someone else. That we should feed off of each other's creativity. Just because you can write stories does not mean I can't write stories too.
* Domestic Goddess: Permaculture design; if we apply human genius we can have joy.
* Uncannonized Goddess/Goddess of Unwelcomed Information: She has some male aspects; Her work is often dismissed by the academy; she is not included in the cannon; Alice Walker, etc.
* Erotic Goddess: She did not have a full example yet, but took requests. 2-3 people suggested Annie Sprinkle.
* Goddess of Social Nurturing: Starhawk talked a lot about Lakoff's book and how nurturing is strength.

Her closing statements were about how we need to embrace the body, life, and regeneration.

There was a Q&A session and selfishly with my heart in my throat I stood up and asked her a two-part question. "How can we help each other work out of being stuck in our grief. The administration took advantage of our collective grief after the terrorist attacks. And also, how do you work your way out of a personal rut?"

She spoke kindly and gently about how we all have our own timetables. That just because we are trailing others, we should not feel bad that we are not where others are. She also said that we should have at least one person we can go to in order to just vent, cry, scream, etc.

On the first point, it made me feel better. Part of my rut is made up of this feeling that I'm dragging my family down. Questioning why I can't just heal when my dad & youngest sisters are much more healed than I am.

On the last point, I know she's right. I've always known this. But there are limits to even closest friendships. I know people are busy and even the best of friends can snap and reject you - even for one minute. I know of one friend who told me just a year before my mom died that he was tired of people coming to him with all their problems. Now how am I supposed to go to him with my sorrow? Even thou I know that he'd hold me while I cried?

To end on a brighter note. I got to say thank you to her at the reception and did another selfish thing - got her to sign my copy of "The Pagan Book of Living and Dying" which I started soon after my mom died, but then just stopped. As some of you can attest, I'm not shy about going up to rock stars and saying hi, but Starhawk was different. She totally had me in a trance and I couldn't say much of anything to her. I wanted to tell her how much she changed my life, how much even just a few pages of "The Pagan Book of Living and Dying" helped me, but all I could say was thank you. But I think I'll start rereading that book. I won't blog about it. Even the small amount of notes I already have are so personal that it hurts to reread them.

If you got all the way to the end. Thanks.

Labels: goddess