MotherTalk poses this question:
Dangerous Boys by brothers Conn and Hal Iggulden, reminds us of the days before our culture banished the jungle gyms, and stopped kids from playing in treehouses, running go-carts, and whittling wood with a Swiss Army knife to make a bow and arrow. After a single-page introduction lamenting over the ways we keep our kids from experiencing risk and adventure, The Dangerous Book for Boys mixes recipes of outdoor fun with small-chapter information ranging from great battles, the seven wonders of the ancient world, parts of speech, and how to tap Morse Code.
- Have we made childhood too safe? Are we too afraid for our children, too scared to let them wander, ride bikes around the block, take risks? What are the real risks, which are imagined, and how do we navigate these, as their moms?
I haven't read this book and I don't plan on it. Why? Because the basic premise is that only boys can be dangerous. For a better blog post about the gender issues, see
ginmar's post. Yes dear readers, I'd rather focus on the dangerous aspect of this prompt than to tackle the gender issue.
Still with me? Good.
Spend a few minutes with Miss Ella and you'll know that I'm mothering a pretty dangerous woman-child. She loves to jump, jump off of things, climb, jump off, run, and all the great things I remember doing as a kid. I had deep pride in the fact that by 5th grade I knew how to run and flip myself over a fence without ripping my clothes or skin on the top of it. I'd ride my bike up and down the street and then do pop-a-wheelies off a homemade ramp. I made it with a piece of plywood and a brick. Yeah, real safe, eh? I'd spend hours in my tree, reading or just watching the world go by. There was one summer where I'd sneak up to the roof and jump off. Don't be too amazed, we lived in a small one-floor house.
Have we made childhood too safe?
Yes and no. A few weeks ago Miss Ella was rollerskating with a neighbor. The neighbor girl, K, didn't have knee pads, wrist guards, or a helmet on. Heck, she barely had her skates on right! I sat there watching them thinking about when I was a kid skating. Who wore protection then? Seeing yesterday and today skating together made me think that maybe we are too safe today. Then Ella fell and laughed. That's when I knew that her pads were not just keeping her safe, but also making it more fun. She likes falling down and without kneepads, there wouldn't be much laughing. I know that too well.
We didn't have much money growing up, so bikes had to last a long time - even if the brakes were dying. I was racing home one night and took a corner too fast. I wiped out...BIG TIME. I cried the last 2 houses home. I was mad. Mostly at the fact that we were so poor that I was riding a bike without brakes.
On the flip side, there are so many times when the hubby & I butt heads about Ella being too dangerous. Is climbing up on the stoop too dangerous? Is it more so because of the 50 lb flower pot sharing the stoop? Is jumping off the jungle gym really that bad? Especially now that most playgrounds are softer than a gymnastics floor. Ok, maybe it is. But still...a girl's gotta have some fun, right?
In other ways, childhood is safer for great reasons: seat belts, car seats, no riding in the back of the pick-up, on and on. But play shouldn't be just about safety. There needs to be some danger. Why? So that we can push ourselves. If we never take those risks to jump just a little farther than we should, we might not take that large leap move out of our parent's home at 18. And what a bore we'd grow up to be.
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Fearless FridayLabels: blogging, Books, writing