Wednesday, November 26, 2003
( 12:16 PM )
She slept last night!!
Ella fell asleep last night around 8:30 and I really meant to follow her lead. But I wanted to spend some time with the hubby, even if we both were just vegging on the couch. Then the Fab 5 came on and well, I had to see how it all turned out. I ended up in bed by 10:15 and got to sleep until about 3:30 am, got up, fed Miss Ella and then returned her to bed until about 5 am. Thank the gods!
Am I just lame or what? Blogging about sleep. Sheesh!
...
Tuesday, November 25, 2003
( 12:42 PM )
Miss Ella is teething. For the non-mommies out there, let me tell you it's no picnic. I knew that babies get crabby and such, but suga...that's not the half of it!
I often find myself feeling like I wasn't totally prepared for motherhood (who is?) and it's my job to tell it like it is. No cherry-flavored coating here!
The last THREE nights Miss Ella has decided that I must hold her whlie she sleeps. Sure, I can lay her down for a few minutes, but it hasn't been more than 90 minutes. When she wakes up, she screams. No crying folks, SCREAMS come out of my precious lil grrl. At a rally in the future, she should be able to hold her own. Part of the night I try to get her down in her crib...but by 2 am I'm ready for her to just sleep in our bed. The hubby's pretty tired as well, so even if I tell him that she's joined us, he often wakes up surprised that his daughter has her legs in his ribs (althou not cracking them!).
We've given her Tylenol, she chews the hell outta her stuffed Tigger, doesn't like the chew/teether toys, and is crabby a lot. The best part of this is that I know it's a phase. She's growing up quickly and before I know it, this will all be over. But can't I get a nap in the meantime?
...
Monday, November 24, 2003
( 2:59 PM )
Despite that I love Ella's name, I am having major buyers remose on it as well. I wish I had named her Athena or something more exotic than Ella. *shrug* For a time the hubby and I did wish we had just named her Paris. Thankfully Brandon reminded us that the gloved one named his daughter Paris. *shudder* Now that he's back in the pedophile news AND that when you say Paris now, people think of a spoiled rich brat on tape I am soooo glad that we didn't name her Paris. Of course, now that she's almost 4 months old, she looks like an Ella to me.
...
Thursday, November 20, 2003
( 1:51 PM )
Ella knows how to roll over.
She did it once over the weekend, but used my knee to brace herself on. She did it once here at work, but she was on a somewhat lumpy pile of blankets & coats. Her teachers at daycare reported to the hubby yesterday that they were using her as show-n-tell for the other babies and trying to teach them how to roll over. *bahahahaha* My lil one is already showing others how to get things done. *beaming with pride*
According to Baby Center.com, Ella's on the early end of learning this skill. When I tell other vet mommies about it, they all gasp and say, "She's too young!" Ah, that's my grrl. It scares me thou. That means she'll be sitting up early, crawling early, walking early, talking early, and running early! Well, that's what's running thru my head anyway.
Now to actually see her new skill in action.
...
Wednesday, November 19, 2003
( 1:36 PM )
The past few weeks I've been feeling guilty about not feeling sad that I leave Ella and head to work. Yesterday was her first day of daycare (before then, she was being cared for at home). I went to see her during work and the lil buggar was so happy! I dropped her off this morning and she was pretty happy again. I just went to check on her over lunch and wa-la! Happy Baby!
She smiles at the caregivers and the other babies. Me thinks she's thinking, "Hey, why didn't I arrive at this party sooner?"
As I left the daycare, I was thinking about why I wasn't crying. I just left my baby in the care of someone else, she was happy, she wasn't crying for me...I concluded that I'm happy.
I'm happy that she's happy, that she has friends, that she's having fun, that I'm back at work, and I think I'm a lil proud of her too. I think she's going to be a very outgoing child who can dazzle most people she meets. Where she gets it, I have no idea. I was fairly shy as a kid (still kinda am) and her daddy's a quiet one. Me thinks we're going to have our hands full with her and I wouldn't want it any other way.
...
Monday, November 17, 2003
( 12:48 PM )
Some of you may have read the NY Times piece about mothers choosing to stay home instead of work and how this is indictative of a growing movement and possibly a failure of feminism in America. Well honey, sit back and read a fab rebuttal to that shitty theory.
"Mothers of America, it’s time to talk back and refute insulting post-feminist propaganda."
...
Thursday, November 13, 2003
( 9:17 AM )
Miss Ella has discovered that she has toes! OK, mama helped her figure it out, but still...she's sucking her toes now. Sometimes it gets in the way of changing her diaper, but it's so damn cute! She's also decided that most of the time her pacifier just doesn't cut it. She much prefers her thumb. *giggle*
Ahhh...she's growing up so fast. 3 1/2 months...*sigh*
Ella's daddy does not like her sucking her toes and blames me for teaching her. He's just being a fuddy-duddy which makes Ella & me laugh. She would have found her toes sooner or later, right? *giggle* I dunno how I'm supposed to be the disciplinarian and still teach Ella how to sneak up on people with water balloons.
...
Tuesday, November 11, 2003
( 2:20 PM )
When people find out that I've returned to work the next thing out of their mouth is "Don't you miss her?"
Well, yes and no. I miss Ella terribly, but I'm not shattered by it. I keep hearing people tell me that their co-worker cried and cried, that they cried and cried when they returned to work. I've been back to work for 3 weeks and I haven't cried once.
This leads to be conclude one of two things:
1) I'm a terrible mother who doesn't give a rats ass about her daughter
or
2) I need more stimulation than an infant & baby and me yoga classes can give.
I'm leaning towards #2 today, althou I have to admit, many days I'd vote for #1.
I truly admire the women who can stay home day after day with their little one(s) without much interaction in the 'adult' world. I feel sorry for the ones that feel trapped at home. I hear too often SAHMs say that they are just bored at home or "it's good to have an adult conversation." I never wanted to become like that and after just three months at home with Ella, I was starting to sound like that. It takes a special kind of woman to be able to care for a baby and get the right amount of 'big people time' into her day.
I have to admire the part of me that recognizes that I can't stay at home full-time. If I ignored that and did stay at home, I'd probably drive Ella nuts. I have to admire it cause without doing so, I fall back to thinking that I'm a terrible mother without a heart.
I can't wait to get home to her every day. I can't wait to see her face light up when Mommy walks thru the door. Gawd, I miss her so much when I'm at work. OK, maybe now I'll start to cry. Not cause I'm at work, but because I love her so damn much. Yet I still can't help but wonder, am I missing something?
...
Monday, November 10, 2003
( 11:49 AM )
I miss Paris.
The hubby misses Paris.
We miss that when we cuddle together Paris is inbetween us. The hubby misses waking up at 1 am to play with Paris while I sleep. I miss the kicks, the hiccups, the rolls of my baby growing inside of me.
We still look at each other and say, "Where's Paris?" Then we giggle and say, "She's in her crib! Aaahhh!!" LOL
...
Wednesday, November 05, 2003
( 11:56 AM )
Check her out!
...
Tuesday, November 04, 2003
( 4:34 PM )
Since Ella is a breast-fed baby and I'm at work, I have to pump milk for her. It's a grueling task. Every three-four hours, I have to find a way to close my door and pump, pump away. Today was the first day that's it's been a chore to find time. Work just got overwhelming and in my line of work, if there's a line of people to see me, I can't just shut my door. But I did - once. It doesn't help that I try to pump as much as I can in as little time as possible. I think my breasts know it and don't like to be rushed. I can't possibly be empty, but it feels like it some days.
The best part of the day? Going home. Yesterday I curled up with Ella on the bed to get her to fall asleep...she turned onto her side and grabbed for my shirt. Awww...She wnated to nurse for comfort. Well, she's waiting for me now. Gotta run!
...
Monday, November 03, 2003
( 11:16 AM )
In order to keep my other blog from getting too out of control, most postings about Ella, mommyhood, and other things related to such things will be posted here. I'm not trying to have a public/private blog separation, just trying to keep things orderly in my non-MT blog-life. wow... that was quite the mouthful, eh?
To reward you for coming by, here's a pic of us on Halloween:
I didn't have time to get myself a real fairy outfit, so I thought the wings would be enough. Ella didn't fit any costumes I could find, so she just wore a purple onesie with matching wings. She was the hit of the mall.
...
( 12:16 PM )
Sleep!
She slept last night!!
Ella fell asleep last night around 8:30 and I really meant to follow her lead. But I wanted to spend some time with the hubby, even if we both were just vegging on the couch. Then the Fab 5 came on and well, I had to see how it all turned out. I ended up in bed by 10:15 and got to sleep until about 3:30 am, got up, fed Miss Ella and then returned her to bed until about 5 am. Thank the gods!
Am I just lame or what? Blogging about sleep. Sheesh!
#:::
( 12:42 PM )
I'm so tired!
Miss Ella is teething. For the non-mommies out there, let me tell you it's no picnic. I knew that babies get crabby and such, but suga...that's not the half of it!
I often find myself feeling like I wasn't totally prepared for motherhood (who is?) and it's my job to tell it like it is. No cherry-flavored coating here!
The last THREE nights Miss Ella has decided that I must hold her whlie she sleeps. Sure, I can lay her down for a few minutes, but it hasn't been more than 90 minutes. When she wakes up, she screams. No crying folks, SCREAMS come out of my precious lil grrl. At a rally in the future, she should be able to hold her own. Part of the night I try to get her down in her crib...but by 2 am I'm ready for her to just sleep in our bed. The hubby's pretty tired as well, so even if I tell him that she's joined us, he often wakes up surprised that his daughter has her legs in his ribs (althou not cracking them!).
We've given her Tylenol, she chews the hell outta her stuffed Tigger, doesn't like the chew/teether toys, and is crabby a lot. The best part of this is that I know it's a phase. She's growing up quickly and before I know it, this will all be over. But can't I get a nap in the meantime?
#:::
( 2:59 PM )
What's in a name?
Despite that I love Ella's name, I am having major buyers remose on it as well. I wish I had named her Athena or something more exotic than Ella. *shrug* For a time the hubby and I did wish we had just named her Paris. Thankfully Brandon reminded us that the gloved one named his daughter Paris. *shudder* Now that he's back in the pedophile news AND that when you say Paris now, people think of a spoiled rich brat on tape I am soooo glad that we didn't name her Paris. Of course, now that she's almost 4 months old, she looks like an Ella to me.
#:::
( 1:51 PM )
It's Official
Ella knows how to roll over.
She did it once over the weekend, but used my knee to brace herself on. She did it once here at work, but she was on a somewhat lumpy pile of blankets & coats. Her teachers at daycare reported to the hubby yesterday that they were using her as show-n-tell for the other babies and trying to teach them how to roll over. *bahahahaha* My lil one is already showing others how to get things done. *beaming with pride*
According to Baby Center.com, Ella's on the early end of learning this skill. When I tell other vet mommies about it, they all gasp and say, "She's too young!" Ah, that's my grrl. It scares me thou. That means she'll be sitting up early, crawling early, walking early, talking early, and running early! Well, that's what's running thru my head anyway.
Now to actually see her new skill in action.
#:::
( 1:36 PM )
Guilt
The past few weeks I've been feeling guilty about not feeling sad that I leave Ella and head to work. Yesterday was her first day of daycare (before then, she was being cared for at home). I went to see her during work and the lil buggar was so happy! I dropped her off this morning and she was pretty happy again. I just went to check on her over lunch and wa-la! Happy Baby!
She smiles at the caregivers and the other babies. Me thinks she's thinking, "Hey, why didn't I arrive at this party sooner?"
As I left the daycare, I was thinking about why I wasn't crying. I just left my baby in the care of someone else, she was happy, she wasn't crying for me...I concluded that I'm happy.
I'm happy that she's happy, that she has friends, that she's having fun, that I'm back at work, and I think I'm a lil proud of her too. I think she's going to be a very outgoing child who can dazzle most people she meets. Where she gets it, I have no idea. I was fairly shy as a kid (still kinda am) and her daddy's a quiet one. Me thinks we're going to have our hands full with her and I wouldn't want it any other way.
#:::
( 12:48 PM )
Post-Feminist Swill Redux
Some of you may have read the NY Times piece about mothers choosing to stay home instead of work and how this is indictative of a growing movement and possibly a failure of feminism in America. Well honey, sit back and read a fab rebuttal to that shitty theory.
"Mothers of America, it’s time to talk back and refute insulting post-feminist propaganda."
#:::
( 9:17 AM )
Toes & Thumbs
Miss Ella has discovered that she has toes! OK, mama helped her figure it out, but still...she's sucking her toes now. Sometimes it gets in the way of changing her diaper, but it's so damn cute! She's also decided that most of the time her pacifier just doesn't cut it. She much prefers her thumb. *giggle*
Ahhh...she's growing up so fast. 3 1/2 months...*sigh*
Ella's daddy does not like her sucking her toes and blames me for teaching her. He's just being a fuddy-duddy which makes Ella & me laugh. She would have found her toes sooner or later, right? *giggle* I dunno how I'm supposed to be the disciplinarian and still teach Ella how to sneak up on people with water balloons.
#:::
( 2:20 PM )
Missing
When people find out that I've returned to work the next thing out of their mouth is "Don't you miss her?"
Well, yes and no. I miss Ella terribly, but I'm not shattered by it. I keep hearing people tell me that their co-worker cried and cried, that they cried and cried when they returned to work. I've been back to work for 3 weeks and I haven't cried once.
This leads to be conclude one of two things:
1) I'm a terrible mother who doesn't give a rats ass about her daughter
or
2) I need more stimulation than an infant & baby and me yoga classes can give.
I'm leaning towards #2 today, althou I have to admit, many days I'd vote for #1.
I truly admire the women who can stay home day after day with their little one(s) without much interaction in the 'adult' world. I feel sorry for the ones that feel trapped at home. I hear too often SAHMs say that they are just bored at home or "it's good to have an adult conversation." I never wanted to become like that and after just three months at home with Ella, I was starting to sound like that. It takes a special kind of woman to be able to care for a baby and get the right amount of 'big people time' into her day.
I have to admire the part of me that recognizes that I can't stay at home full-time. If I ignored that and did stay at home, I'd probably drive Ella nuts. I have to admire it cause without doing so, I fall back to thinking that I'm a terrible mother without a heart.
I can't wait to get home to her every day. I can't wait to see her face light up when Mommy walks thru the door. Gawd, I miss her so much when I'm at work. OK, maybe now I'll start to cry. Not cause I'm at work, but because I love her so damn much. Yet I still can't help but wonder, am I missing something?
#:::
( 11:49 AM )
Paris
I miss Paris.
The hubby misses Paris.
We miss that when we cuddle together Paris is inbetween us. The hubby misses waking up at 1 am to play with Paris while I sleep. I miss the kicks, the hiccups, the rolls of my baby growing inside of me.
We still look at each other and say, "Where's Paris?" Then we giggle and say, "She's in her crib! Aaahhh!!" LOL
#:::
( 11:56 AM )
Maya's Here!
Check her out!
#:::
( 4:34 PM )
Running on Empty
Since Ella is a breast-fed baby and I'm at work, I have to pump milk for her. It's a grueling task. Every three-four hours, I have to find a way to close my door and pump, pump away. Today was the first day that's it's been a chore to find time. Work just got overwhelming and in my line of work, if there's a line of people to see me, I can't just shut my door. But I did - once. It doesn't help that I try to pump as much as I can in as little time as possible. I think my breasts know it and don't like to be rushed. I can't possibly be empty, but it feels like it some days.
The best part of the day? Going home. Yesterday I curled up with Ella on the bed to get her to fall asleep...she turned onto her side and grabbed for my shirt. Awww...She wnated to nurse for comfort. Well, she's waiting for me now. Gotta run!
#:::
( 11:16 AM )
Relaunch!
In order to keep my other blog from getting too out of control, most postings about Ella, mommyhood, and other things related to such things will be posted here. I'm not trying to have a public/private blog separation, just trying to keep things orderly in my non-MT blog-life. wow... that was quite the mouthful, eh?
To reward you for coming by, here's a pic of us on Halloween:
I didn't have time to get myself a real fairy outfit, so I thought the wings would be enough. Ella didn't fit any costumes I could find, so she just wore a purple onesie with matching wings. She was the hit of the mall.
#:::
